just some thoughts

There are a number of reasons why I have decided to write this book. I am discouraged by how contemporary society and educational institutions are shaping the leaders of tomorrow. Being book smart does not necessarily prepare you with the tools needed to face the challenges in life. Attributes, such as the ability to speak convincingly and eloquently, the facility to think on your feet; creating ideas that challenge boundaries, the capacity to size up situations and come out with logical conclusions and at the same time always willing to keep a sense of wonder, planning meaningful goals yet willing to risk failure in achieving them; feeling brave and confident to stand tall whenever we fall, go a long way in setting us up for the many curve balls life has in store for us.

Since schools are not nurturing these skills- in fact, work against most of them- proactive parents who care about the intellectual development of their children and want to guide them toward a bright future have to take action, and take action immediately.

Getting back to basics and the need for testing and accountability. Switching to something refreshing, inspiring and restoring. Parents need to see child’s world from the child’s eyes. They need to understand what makes us children tick in the 21st century and discover the different struggles that we go through growing up in a fast paced Asian society.

Parents need to find out the root of the problems and learn how to be slow to anger and accusations. They need to understand that the teachers and leaders are not always right and learn to humble themselves to lovingly ask the child and not assume that they are automatically wrong. Parents need to flow with our interests and strengths and help us develop what we are already innately gifted with. They can introduce us to more options but let us be the chief of our lives. Hence parents need to know that they should not force their son to spend long endless hours over his math homework if he hates math.

They have to take a breath and put things into perspective.

They must understand that they want a child who will do exceedingly well in life, realize his passion and is willing to innovate and take risks. They need to realize that a child needs to be provided for with knowledge, skills and most importantly values, but it is still the child’s choice to ultimately pick and choose what makes him who he really is. They need to help train their child to have a giving nature and a heart of forgiveness towards others and most importantly towards themselves. They need to teach them values and tenacity from the home in order for them to pick them selves up in the real; world and continue to try hard without fretting over their mistakes. It is about teaching your child to fall forward and picking themselves up after the storm.

Scoring high in one’s PSLE and A Levels is not that important. Parent need to realize what is reality and ask themselves how much a difference did an extra few points on their grade them in their advancement in their career. The world has changed over the years and is very different from a few decades ago. One decade in today’s pop culture is like centuries in the swing and ‘twist twist’ times of the past. Look at how fast technology has changes in the last decade or even year. It is crazy what type of dilemmas our children face now.

Frankly, even though I am writing this book in attempt to close the gap of misunderstand between parent and child, I too am pretty lost in what the students of today is facing. Think about it, when did we learn about atoms and molecules? Children in our Singapore schools are apparently learning in in Primary three, isn’t that insane?

So here is a suggestion to the dear parents who are reading this book, why not consider creating a new type of report card for your children. One that is focused around their values, their family and their strengths and interests. Next help them achieve their maximum potential and always uplift instead of pull down.


Doing something you love

Doing something you love helps one retain your intellectual energy while the rest of the world is loosing theirs. It helps you shine when everyone is too caught up in being a little above average in everything. It doesn’t pay to be a jack of all traits. I am speaking this from my own experience, as I am an individual who is blessed with many gifts and interests. I ended up dabbling in many things sometimes too many for my own good. It is good to be ‘in the know’ of how and what is going on but it is more essential to concentrate on a few good things that you can excel in.

Doing something you love to do creates a wonderful capacity to try new things and be resilient when things do not go according to plan. When someone does what he loves, failure does not become such an obstacle. One has a higher tendency to react to it with questions and exploration and are willing to practice something until they get it right. One’s “stick-to-itiveness” when one finds something they love will help them to achieve their highly ambitious goals and their insistence on following their own paths rather than be molded by what society wants them to be. It helps them gather a sense of satisfaction from what they want to do with their lives.